Hard to imagine our little Jaida is already 3 months old. She is the sweetest thing! Her brothers absolutely adore her. They often fight over who gets to hold her, feed her, sit by her, you get the picture. They love entertaining her to, she is very patient with them and hardly ever complains. She recently loves to be in her exersaucer or her "throne" (Bumbo chair). I never had the Bumbo with my boys.. it is awesome! Thanks to my wonderful Grandma Colleen who got it for me. She loves to sit in it and watch her brothers play!
Her check up with the dr. went well she weighed a whoppin' 13 pounds! Yahoo! She is in the 60th percentile! We also found out the results from her sleep study. Not so good news. She is back on continual oxygen. She had some desats in her oxygen levels as well as several apnea episodes, both central and obstructive!
We are trying to stay positive, it gets hard sometimes. I feel like sometimes people think that because she is home we are just fine. We are, don't get me wrong, but we have our moments. I am glad they they are just moments though. For the most part I have really been proud that I have done so well. I never pictured life like this, but I wouldn't have changed anything I have gone through. I feel like I can do hard things and have learned who I can rely on. My faith in God has strengthened and I know he knows me and loves me. I just feel like I need to write these things down so that one day when I look back I can remember the good things that came from the hard things. I have so many blessing and often find the tune, "Count your many blessings" come into my head.It is so true.
I realize that many other people have way harder challenges in life and to others this may seem like a piece of cake. I am in no way complaining. I love life, I love my family and friends. So many people here in Maryland have reached out to me as well. It is incredible the support I have here, even sometimes from complete strangers.
I know that my prayers have been heard and answered. Not always the way I thought they would but they do get answered. I need to write this story down too: When Jaida was in the hospital, I was having a really hard time one day. Every time I went to visit her she would be asleep. I felt as if she wouldn't know that I came to see her, or even know I was her mother. The nurses would always say things like,"as soon as you leave she is wide awake for us!" This was devastating to me. I felt so bad. I was laying in bed that night and was saying my usual prayer that she would get better and just come home soon. When I had the feeling that I was praying for the wrong thing and that I needed to pray for more specific things. That night I told my Father in Heaven what I was feeling and that I just wanted her to know me and know that I was her mother and that I was coming to visit her. When I arrived at the hospital the next day She was awake and looked right into my eyes. I started crying. She stayed awake the entire 3 hours I was there visiting. We just gazed into each others eyes. I knew that my prayers were heard and answered. I know that it sounds simple and dumb, but it wasn't to me. It meant the world.
Sorry to go on a little tangent, I just had to write these things down so I can remember them.
6 comments:
Way to make me cry Mikelle. That was so touching. You and your family are some of the greatest examples. We hope that little Jaida will be doing better soon. We are thinking of you and love you guys tons!
That was beautiful! I'm so glad that you wrote these very touching feelings down so you will be able to always remember them. You are strong, and an amazing mother.
I remember when I used to work with you how you were such a good example to me, and how strong your faith was. The day Justin and I went through the temple I thought of you and thought "Mikelle would be proud of me!" Well now it is my turn to be proud of you. Your faith continues to hold strong at this hard time and I know that you will be deeply blessed because of it. Love ya girl. Hang in there!
Yeah, thanks for making me cry too. You're the best. I sure do love you. You have such a positive attitude all the time.
She is so cute. A pretty good mix of her brothers. I loved that story...a good reminder that Heavenly Father does hear moms simple prayers.
Mikelle, thank you for sharing that beautiful story. I think you truly are an amazingly strong mother with all that you have gone through. Jaida is lucky to have you in her life. Thank you for reminding me that our Father in Heaven is very mindful of us. Know that little Jaida is in our prayers. And we hope to see you soon :)
Mikelle, isn't that the best advise? You never know unless you ask? It is amazing how something as simple as them looking at you can just CHANGE your life.
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